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Archive for October 2018

  • I have some other news I wanted to share. The original reason to this post was to share how my mother is pursuing a job to become more involved in our Columbia Heights, Minnesota town. She is pursuing a path to become mayor here (before her big politicial career). My mom and as well as myself see lots of flaws in the town we live in that could be fixed and solved if the right person was to come in. Also, if people are willing to acknowledge these problems and to fix them. Not talking about it, but taking action that would make real change.

    I am going to get more involved in the community as well. I already am into the community as a Community Nurse, but I suppose for different things. First I'll explain about being a Community Nurse. I go around the neighborhood and nearby neighborhoods and give assistance to seniors and those with mental or physical disabilities.

    For one, I am interested in making a profit out of my Living Doll career once I complete my transformation. I was thinking of ways I could start my Living Doll career and one way is by entertaining those in hospitals and nursing homes I suppose. I wanted to do something I don't see other Living Dolls doing after their transformation. I've done it a few times, but I would like to do it full time and not just a couple of times. This would mean just visiting people in hospitals, not exclusively to children, but to all ages and those in nursing homes. This is another way for emotional therapy and support. In this field, they are always looking for these sorts of things.

    As far as for the community thing, my mom have known the poverty rate is very bad in the area. Looking over statistics, it shows minority groups suffer more from poverty and limited resources in the town and nearby places. I feel diversity is lacking in this town. I did a review on Columbia Heights and how exclusive it is and there's not anything that promotes globalism. Isolation has proven not productive in today's world and perhaps this town is a good example of how others are affected by isolation. In the supposedly richest country in the world, there should not be these many people in poverty.

    When looking at the board in Columbia Heights, there is not a diverse board. The members are predominately White and for years, they've made it difficult for others of different ethnic groups to be included into their community. I feel there should be more tolerance and acceptance in the whole State of Minnesota and the United States. No one has rights to judge other countries when America has a serious problem with diversity, tolerance and inclusion. Also, many talk so much about bridging the gap, but no one is ever making an effort to actually make those gaps bridged.

    No one should be favoured, but what all communities need to realize is that everyone should be treated equally regardless of race, nationality, gender, religion or anything else. My family have been going through a ton of problems in our town related to race and this is why my family would like to take action in trying to solve this problem. I've lived in Columbia Heights since the age of 9 and I've never been treated like I am a part of this community.

    Yeah, Columbia Heights is a small town, where I believe most work at factories and construction, much like in rural areas. When driving around, you'll see lots of open spaces, factories, small shops, very old buildings, lots of trains and a lot of small houses. It's a town where everyone knows everyone's names pretty much. With that said, the town is close-knit but only to a specific group of people. Unfortunately, my family was always excluded out of this group. So, I hope in doing this, there can be more awareness being made about diversity, the poverty crisis, education and health. 

    Community Updates

  • Being a living doll in October, more specifically around Halloween, can be the most annoying thing ever. I say that because people always assume you are wearing a Halloween costume. I get really annoyed when everyone thinks I'm dressing up for Halloween because I'm not. I always have to explain to people I dress like a doll everyday, and actually it's not a costume, but called Lolita, and it's my everyday attire.

    I suppose around this time others would be more accepting of me wearing kawaii clothing because they assume it's a costume. Well, I notice humans do not dress up for Halloween anymore. Children do not even go trick-or-treating. My family stopped passing out candy years ago. So I guess people can still give me strange looks during this time because it is abnormal to them.

    Due to this confusion however, I do not wear my kawaii clothing around Halloween. This is especially after one annoying incident where people were wondering why did I wear my Halloween costume everyday before and even after Halloween. They assumed I was being overly excited for Halloween. That time I wore more of a Gothic Lolita style, which gave off this impression even more. Even when you try to explain to people, they still are confused and say annoying things. So, this is the reason I skip wearing my beautiful clothing during this time.

    Well I try to tone it down a bit until the holiday season is over because I just want everyone to understand I'm not dressing like a doll only for Halloween. Then people comment on how it's too earlier or it's too late for costumes, and then I have to do the whole explaining everything again. I think this is my least favourite thing about being a Living Doll; That you always have to explain and educate others because they lack understanding of the Living Doll society. Even when you explain to people, they remain confused which is even more annoying.

    Although I haven't worn my kawaii clothes in a while, I still wanted to share my experience of the time I was wearing it in October, especially around Halloween. 

    Being a Living Doll in October

  • A while back, I returned to book two on my Fantasy series. About a hundred pages was already finished and so I didn't have to worry about the first nine chapters. Well, there's some things I am unsure about with the beginning and so I want to reread it to see what things I didn't like about it.

    The outline, as usual, was helpful in planning out the major scenes and stuff. I write the outline and then I write the main stuff first so I won't be stuck staring at a blank page. So I write the chapters in the outline and then the main scene and what's suppose to happen in this scene. I feel this is the best organizing plan. For me though. What works for someone else is not guarantee to work for another. So anyway, I had lots of ideas about the main scenes because I feel most excited about it. I think this is my favourite part of writing a book. This way also, I don't have to wait to write down my ideas and risk me forgetting exactly how I wanted the scene to go.

    Recently, I've gotten into an issue of getting less work done. I know how important my writing career is and I stop everything I'm doing, when the time is appropriate and I write at least one paragraph a day. I know if I write day by day, pretty soon, my progress will be seen through the page numbers. They grow steadily, but at least they are growing.

    Since I finished writing all of my main scenes in, I'm stuck with the filler scenes. I sometimes can get stuck on writing in the sub-scenes. I know some writers may share their least favourite part of writing. I don't think I have a least favourite part. This isn't my favourite part, but the sub-scenes isn't my least favourite. I love writing altogether and so it doesn't bother me. I just get a little vexed how I can get stuck on these parts. I must make scene A meet with scene B. I ask, how can I compose it together so both scene A and scene B goes together? And how do I get from scene A to scene B?

    This is the time I sometimes whip out character profiles. I check on character pastimes and stuff to get some ideas on what to put into these filler scenes. I have 156 pages, but I'm having a little problem making 156 pages turn into maybe 300 or more pages. I realized perhaps I made some main scenes too short and I would have to extend many of these scenes. I just don't want them to be a drag, I just need the stuff I add into the main scenes to fit perfectly and naturally.

    I've gotten less done again. Part of the problem is my dumb computer, which happens to be a new computer. I did hear people who live up north like me usually gets poor connections and issues with electronics, but this is ridiculous. I do notice how the weather can affect the performance of the computer and it's when I'm working. I sometimes have to open my outlines through my phone and then write on the computer. I really hate how my family have so many problems with our computers. I have considered buying a new computer, but I know things won't be better because I remember my mom recently purchased a new laptop and it's working horribly for her. I tried not purchasing a Dell computer because their computers only last for 2 years, but it didn't make a difference. The connection is really bad and the computers are worse. After trying, I sometimes give up and do something else.

    Anyway, well, this is the update I wanted to share. I will make sure to give more updates on my progress.

    Filling in Sub-Scenes

  • I have been watching a ton of videos lately that's in relation to the Lolita fashion, Harajuku and Living Doll lifestyle. I discovered new Living Dolls from around the world and also those who are not Living Dolls, but they wear Japanese fashion. It greatly inspired me to get going on my own transformation. It inspired me to continue and to do something I love doing.

    I ran across one particular video on the Harajuku fashion in Japan, where I found the Japanese model Haruka Kurebayashi and her story of wearing kawaii fashion. I am a huge fan of Haruka and I have to say I am one of her followers on Instagram and other social media. I have also became a huge fan of Misako Aoki, another Japanese model for Lolita fashion. Misako is also a nurse just like me!

    One conversation in the video was how many people assume people who wear Lolita or kawaii fashion is because they're hiding behind something or they're trying to conceal something from the world. I know many "experts" in the United States have tried analyzing these people, mostly Living Dolls. Their assumption is that because we're not happy with ourselves or something like that, we wear these clothes and change ourselves to become a real life doll because we want to be someone else. Americans have a misconception about Living Dolls in particular and this post was to address this.

    I have heard of some Living Dolls who state they don't like themselves and so they do the Living Doll thing to make them feel better about themselves. This isn't bad at all. I feel people deserves a right to do whatever would make them happier in their life regardless of what others think.

    As an aspiring Living Doll, personally in my opinion and what Haruka stated too, this is not a part of some facade. It's not about hiding behind something and it's not about being someone different. That isn't my goal here and that's not the goal of most who wear Lolita or those who are Living Dolls. This is not being out of touch with reality or wanting to be in a fantasy world. Some may state this, but in reality, it's not about that. The truth is, this is the real world, and in reality, we live in a world where people should be free to choose their own lifestyle, choose their own fashion and choose what they want to do with their body and money. The world teaches us we're able to be anything and we choose to become a real life doll.

    It's not about putting on a mask to hide behind. I sometimes get annoyed by people who tell people like me they want to see the real me. It's not about being a different person. Being a Living Doll is all about reaching your full potential in beauty and it's to show how beautiful you can become. While the world says, "Let me see the real you." I say, this is the real me. I'm not trying to be someone else. They don't understand that this is the real me and this is who I am, I'm just showing you what's inside. If you examine these clothes, the makeup and hair, it tells you someone who wants to have fun with fashion. It's about the celebration and appreciation for different cultures and fun fashion.

    A Living Doll is also about getting in touch with feminism. Before I wanted to become a Living Doll, I was out of touch with my feminism and was considered a tomboyish person. Now, I appreciate some femininity. This is also about doing something you love doing and doing something that makes you happy. It challenges us to think outside the box, to think creatively, original and to think different. Society feels threatened by us because again, it challenges the perceptions of what is acceptable and what is deemed "normal". I know my style is not mainstream and it's not popular, and this is why people outcast people like me often and they feel threatened. Just because it's not mainstream, that doesn't mean you can't follow it.

    Being a Living Doll is about going against the flow and breaking away from the crowd to go your own way, to create your own style. That's because Lolita, Decora, Fairy Kei or any other fashion allows you to build your own theme and style. It's to stand out, in which I prefer to stand out than to blend in. I don't want to wear clothing and makeup only to chase after temporary trends and to be accepted by society. It challenges society to be an individual, to explore paths that haven't been discovered by the majority. To have fun with life and to have fun with fashion. I suppose also, it's about bringing a part of fantasy, folklore and fairy-tales into the real world.

    Wearing these clothes is mainly about self-expression. It's the same way writers feel about writing, artists feel about painting or drawing and anything else. This is a form of art. It's to express yourself through fashion, makeup, accessories, hair and your lifestyle. This is a beautiful art to sculpt your face and body to become a real life porcelain doll or a character. Others perception of beauty is obviously different. There is no right and wrong way to appreciate fashion and to express yourself. Expression comes in all forms and this is also my way of expressing myself and to make myself feel more comfortable in my own skin. Society should stop ridiculing and criticizing us, but instead, they should take the time out to understand. Also, the media and "experts" should stop analyzing us and painting us to be delusional and dumb. Why is it dumb to express yourself and to do what makes you feel happy?

    One last thing, I wanted to address the negative comments made by family, especially parents to those who wears Lolita or who are Living Dolls. I've ran across many parents in America who ridicule their children, but should parents and family support their life decisions? Yes they should. Your children are only borrowed to you and they should be treated as individuals and as people, not as something you have to control all the time. If more parents supported their children's dreams, more would be astounded by their achievements. I am very grateful for my mother who did introduce me to the Living Doll world back in 2014. I'm also grateful she continues to support my decision in being a real life doll. She understands this is something that would make me most happy in my life. This is something that I would consider to be the thing that I want the most. It's to not just be beautiful, but to be porcelain doll beautiful. I think it's beautiful to resemble a doll or Anime character.    

    Misunderstanding of being a Living Doll

  • I did share already how I was finished with book one of my Fantasy series. Now I am working on getting my second book finished. This is while I work on researching on the right literary agent and publisher. I am currently trying to see if there would be an agent who would be willing to deal with an international publisher.

    I am a person who outlines and likes to do a lot of planning out before actually writing the book. Year ago I had already wrote out the outline to book two and I just finished for the other books. I am just following along with how I wanted the book to go. I feel this is easier for me. I have eliminated the problem of writer's block, unable to keep track of the length of chapters and of the entire book and I believe I cut my work in half. I noticed I can spend less time rewriting the book.

    I put book two and the other books on hold so I can finish book one. I realized working on other projects hindered me from finishing the book I wanted to publish first. So I put it on hold until now. When returning to the book, I realized about nine chapters were already written, which cut my work in half even more.

    I believe I have written 156 pages so far. I know I still have a long way to go, but I think the way I'm writing helps me write the stories faster. Yes, I have about 300 or so pages to go. The first book is about 500 I believe. So, I hope to be finished soon. I will make another post about my progress and will definitely make another post when I have finished writing the book.

    Book 2 Progress

  • I just read an article from The Medium, Why You Should not Write a Book, I wanted to post my take on this since I have been seeing countless articles similar to this one advising against people to publish their books and to start their career as a writer. I feel this is a bad piece of advice and here is the reason why I believe so. The article is basically saying the reasons why you shouldn't want to become a writer, but I am not commenting solely upon this article, but the articles I've ran across that have advised people not to become writers and not to publish their work.

    The writers that are listed in the article as the writers who got lucky becoming famous and known globally, well, we all know that writers, but not only writers, but artists, inventors, creators or anyone else has been plagued with self-doubt. Also too we have had several people either online and/or offline to advise us not to follow our dreams and not to become a writer or anything else. If these famous writers listened to those people, think about the entertainment the world would be deprived of knowing. If everyone thought like this, believing that they're work is bad, in which everyone does doubt their work every once in a while, no books would be available to read, no movies could be watched, there wouldn't be cars for us to drive, the inventions that we know wouldn't have been invented and those famous paintings wouldn't be in the museums for generations to view, plus our favourite video games wouldn't exist.

    Also this article is against writers who say they're writing for themselves, and not for the world. I know I am one of those who have said this, and in fact, that is my reason to write. I feel many of these "experts" misunderstand why people may state this. They are saying that they don't need fame, they don't need fortune, and they don't need the acceptance of others in order to fuel their passion for writing, for writing itself is their reward. They do not need much in return, for they wouldn't be overly obsessed in pleasing others because not everyone is going to like the work you do, and it's wrong of these experts to say it is incorrect to write solely because you like writing, and that you would like to have a writer's life and to have a career as a writer. What purpose would there be to become a writer if you don't want to be an actual writer, you don't want the life of a writer, and you're not doing this because you like writing but only so people can accept you? This is a person who have lost their own views and goals, but they are a slave to following the forever changing trends and being accepted by everyone, in which as a writer, you are never going to please everyone. There are lots who love your writing, but there is also that small group of people who dislike your work and who perhaps dislike you. No matter what you do, you probably would never be able to please these people.

    The more and more I began to read advice from these self-proclaimed experts, I noticed that's when I became discouraged from pursuing a career to become a writer. I developed self-doubt to the point I seriously considered giving up my writing, which is the only thing I love doing. These articles are not helping people, but they're the cause of self doubt and the fear of rejection. They are the cause of those who give up their dreams altogether. I did take courses on writing and stuff, but I strayed away from reading anymore articles like these, especially the series of recent articles that are telling people they shouldn't be a writer just because they want to be a writer and they want to publish books.

    I have never heard of a writer who wanted to be a published writer solely to be famous and to be rich. Who cares about those things? No one is actually obsessing over being rich and famous from their writing. I feel these experts misunderstand the mind of a real writer completely. I am aware that some people can say they wish to be a writer, and yet they don't wish to do the work that comes with being a writer. They aren't willing to do the research, but most importantly, they don't have the will to sit down and write a book length story.

    I know I have had many people telling me that there's no way I can become a writer and before they even know who I am, and know of my work ethics, they're telling me I am not writer material. This was because of my age. Tell me, who is writer material? If I listen to people who evaluate those assuming their work is bad, and their idea is stupid, then who knows what potential that person had, but only because they listened to discouragement, they will never know what they could have became. I have sacrificed things for my writing and dedicated most of my life on research and crafting the best book I could write. I spent all hours of the night writing and working on my WIPs non-stop. If you say that's not writer material, then I'm not sure what is, if someone is dedicating themselves to their work.

    Most of these things we know and love wouldn't have existed if they listened to that, giving up their hard work only because they're assuming their work isn't good and that it's a bad idea. I feel these self-proclaimed experts are killing more dreams than they are helping people achieve them. After reading that particular article, to me, if I was to read it from beginning to end, and then that strange conclusion, who would wish to still pursue a writing career after reading that? I know if I was in my earlier stages of writing, I probably would have thought I should give up because I myself even thought my ideas were dumb and not worthy to be published. Well, that's the reason why it took me 14 years to craft my Fantasy book because I was listening to their advice for years until I broke away from them. It is okay to get information from them, but certain things especially discouraging people to become writers I feel is invalid information and it's not useful nor is it helpful.  

    Very Bad Piece of Advice for Writers

  • I realized most people have never heard of Lolita before. Since I will mention this in future posts, I wanted to at least give a definition of it.

    Lolita originated in Japan and it is fashion from the Japanese sub-culture, which is the kawaii world. Kawaii means cute in Japanese and it's also a part of the sub-culture of Japan that is obsessed with cute. The Lolita fashion involves ruffles, lace and big puffy dresses. An example of the Lolita fashion. If you want more examples of this sort of fashion, visit here which is my Pinterest board for Lolita:


    As you can see, Lolita is a fashion that is steered towards being cute or kawaii. Yes, Lolita can be very expensive when purchasing, ranging from 100$-2000$. The more elaborate the dress is, the more expensive they tend to be. Then there is "Brand", which means buying from brands that sells Lolita clothing and they are more expensive to buy from. Most of these brand companies originate from Japan, where the Lolita fashion originated from.

    The Lolita fashion resembles dolly clothes which is why Living Dolls also wear Lolita, but everyday. Yes, there are some people who loves Japanese fashion who wears these types of clothing everyday such as myself. Most will get strange stares and negative comments from those outside, but most who wears Lolita doesn't see anything wrong with wearing Lolita everyday. It's beautiful clothing that deserves to be worn and seen more often. Lolita is my favourite style of clothing because it's elegant, classy and beautiful. I love the details in the dresses, the grace and the colours.

    So, I hope people have a clear understanding of what is Lolita. 

    What Is Lolita

  • I already gave the definition of a Living Doll on my Living Doll page on the blog, but some people still don't understand. This is a post giving full details and the full definition to what is a Living Doll for those who ask me online outside of the blog or anywhere else. It is due to most people do not know what a Living Doll is and because those who think they know what a Living Doll is, they have a misunderstanding.

    So again, a Living Doll is a person who wishes to have real life features of a doll. I guess others can say we've became so obsessed with how dolls look, we dedicate most of our adult lives wanting to become one, wanting to look like one. It stems from a person's interest in dolls and their appreciation of how beautiful dolls look. You may also call us Real Life Dolls or a Human Doll. This is basically meaning the same thing.

    I know you probably have ran across stories where people, both men and women have used plastic surgery, body modification to transform themselves into a real life Barbie, or a real life doll, a cartoon or any character. Mostly the dolly look is achieved through plastic surgery AND makeup. Others can also just use makeup to make themselves look more doll-like. Usually Living Dolls must follow the makeup trends from Japan, South Korea or China to get our desired look.

    It can be pretty hard to tell who actually started this trend, because I have heard about the trend of many young women from East Asia getting plastic surgery to resemble dolls. A lot of them are commonly from Japan, South Korea and China. People just viewed it as part of the Asian culture, for they do have a sub-culture for obsessing over everything cute and dolly. However, I think it didn't get a global enticement until young women from Ukraine and Russia began going to extremes to look like real life dolls. When a bunch of Russians and Ukrainians began doing this, the world was astounded by their amazing transformations and how they were able to achieve their goals in looking exactly like real life dolls. I think it didn't reach a global thing with East Asia because most of the Japanese, Chinese, Koreans and other East Asian women already look like dolls. Really they don't need plastic surgery to resemble dolls. However, people from all over the world wanted in on this trend.

    Yes, being a Living Doll can be considered a trend. I've read a question on the age of Living Dolls, and actually those who are extreme living dolls are usually in their mid or late twenties. Most though don't start their Living Doll career until at the age of thirty as well. This is due to the cost of the plastic surgery and the clothing. The Living Doll trend mostly intrigues millennials (18-29). People may then wonder why are millennials so obsessed with looking like dolls?

    I know many people wonder if we wear our dolly clothing everyday, and the answer is yes. Living Dolls wear clothing similar to what you'll see an actual doll wearing. This is often times going into the Japanese fashion because their clothing from the sub-culture looks more doll like. It's not a part of some fetish or act, and NO it is not a costume. I know people might think it's just a costume, but to a Living Doll, this is our normal, everyday style that we wear every single day and every time we leave out the door. It is a part of who we are and it's a part of a lifestyle of becoming a real life doll.

    The most common misunderstanding is that people often assume being a real life doll is a part of some weird fetish. It's no way related to a fetish or anything related to that. Being a Living Doll is simply someone who only wishes to resemble a doll, nothing more. Again, it is completely innocent. Yes again, the real life doll thing is going more into Fantasy, Fairytale lifestyle like roleplaying. However, it's someone who you could say is obsessed in how dolls look and so they want to look like one. All they want to achieve is to have real life features of a doll, Anime character, figurine or any other character.

    Have you ever wondered what would it be like if dolls could come to life? What would they look like if they were made real? This is our goal. I guess others can say it's a part of some like those shows, "My Strange Addiction" and how people could look at the world differently. Of course, people can be creeped out by it because of the phobia of dolls, clowns, puppets and toys. Horror films have fed on people's fear of dolls coming to life and this is part of the reason people are afraid of those who call themselves real life dolls.

    Of course, there is lots of criticism that comes with being a Living Doll. You get criticized by the media, by feminists, celebrities and everyone else. When you are outside, people give you strange looks because you are wearing cute, dolly styled clothing and you stand out. People will question why you dress that way and you'll hear bad comments. The media and bloggers try to influence people into believing Living Dolls are creepy, vain, stupid and other comments, and we're suppose to be a bad influence on women.

    I recently got a series of criticism because I am still pursuing my Living Doll career, and that's why I disabled comments for my blog again. I feel people do have a right to do whatever they wish to do. This is not your life, this is not your money and it's not your body, so why should you care what I do?

    For me, I decided to pursue my dream in becoming a real life doll because I have always been fascinated in how dolls looked. I loved how they looked so beautiful, so graceful and so flawless. Resembling a doll is beautiful to me. I'm not doing this for others, I am doing this because it makes me feel happy. I think the Lolita dresses and the dolly clothes are beautiful, and they're underrated. As for historical dresses, I can't see why people can't wear them again. They were beautiful dresses and they are still beautiful. More people should learn to appreciate Lolita, dolly dresses and historical dresses. I choose the style I love, and I choose to do what makes me happy regardless of what others think.     

    What is a Living Doll


  • It's time for another The Insecure Writer's Support Group and if you wish to learn more about it, visit this link....

    How do major life events affect your writing? Has writing ever helped you through something?

    Nothing could affect me in a way I can stop writing, but this affect can be different forms of how writers are affected by life events. No matter what, I have always been able to continue writing. However...

    Through the years, the experts have advised to separate your personal stuff with your writing and I have learned to separate certain things. After finding out about my mother's adoptive background, I notice that I tend to add adopted characters in my recent projects. I feel the adoption was a major life event because I realized everything I thought I knew about my mother and myself was a lie  Not all of them, for I am able to detach myself from my writing in order to come up with completely different things. Like some characters even, I have been taught to not always develop the characters as yourself and I've done this most of the times. However, I do like to take specific things from animals and humans that I have observed, and incorporate this into one of my WIPs.

    Living in a haunted house, writing about it has helped me through the strangest experiences. With the things I have witnessed over the years, I felt compelled to write down everything that I have seen, heard and felt. While it didn't make things go away, it certainly helped me decipher what was paranormal. I believe because I have grown up in a haunted house, I find myself writing more into the paranormal genre, about spirits, death, demons and even hell in order to educate others on the knowledge I have gained on these topics. I have been willing to share what I have encountered in my family's haunted house through a book. I feel compelled to share what I have seen, for the things I've encountered are unusual and things that are worth sharing to the world.

    I know labeling myself as a living doll, although I haven't yet completed my living doll transformation, I know dolls are suppose to be cute and sweet. I like to think of myself as made up of sugar and spice and everything nice, and I try to fit this. The things that scares the average person, no longer scares me however. Like living in a haunted house would scare someone else, but the thought doesn't alarm me anymore.

    Recently, I have been drawn to Slavic names, and this was influenced by the adoptive background. So I've been naming my characters, even some from my first Fantasy book I have finished, I unknowingly gave them Slavic names. So I improvised and made them into Russian characters. I also find myself using elements from the Russian culture, again, unknowingly until I look it up. I find myself recently driven to incorporate things based off my previously unknown ancestral culture, perhaps due to a yearning to get closer to who I really am. I've added more Russian and also other Eastern European characters and settings to my WIPs. I feel by adding this, due to the research a writer is required of doing, perhaps this could be a way to learn about my ancestry.

    Since one day I noticed that I was able to speak Russian like a native speaker without learning the language-I know this isn't normal and I'm unsure how it could happen. However, since I can, I have been trying to make use of the language I unknowingly knew how to speak for a few years now. I wonder could ancestry influence this too? Can others speak in languages from their ancestral backgrounds? Anyway, I have been using this to create Fantasy type vocabulary, although it will be based from the Russian language. I perhaps would one day share the story of when I first found out I can speak fluent Russian.

    I can say however that writing has helped me through some tough times. I believe my journey for knowledge did affect my writing in a big way as well. My research along with writing went hand to hand in assisting me during my upsetting moments. I am not really affected by major life events, unless it relates to death, but only if someone I have personally known for a while. I tend to think and write more related to death in order to share the things I have learned about death, but most importantly life after death.

    On that note, I due feel that my life and perhaps my writing was affected by the death of a friend who died at the age of 16 due to her obesity. That is something that I would never forget. If you are interested in reading her story, visit here.

    Realized I wrote a lot, and so I think I should end it there. 

    IWSG: October

  • I first heard of this product on Instagram. At first, I was skeptical about ordering from Instagram, but actually I didn't buy mines from Instagram. Then I came across another video which demonstrated how the tool worked. It claimed this tool could deeply clean your face. It's suppose to suck dirt off. That was when I became curious if it actually works.

    So I ordered it online and a few weeks later it arrived. I have heard a negative comment about if you keep the tool in one place for too long, it develops bruises on your face. One person shared how the tool left scars on her face after the wounds healed. I was still curious and tried it for myself.



    This is the product that was purchased.

    Well, I was not warned about the loud noise it makes. With that said, I did find that the tool actually did work. At first it did feel weird having something pulling your skin, but once you realize it won't pull off your skin, you'll learn it does deeply clean. I learned it's best to wet your face so it could work best. I was curious if this tool does leave marks on your face if you keep it in one spot for a long time. Well it didn't do anything after keeping it on my cheek for a while.

    Your face does get red and in some areas, you may notice your skin may show a sensitivity. I noticed on the nose it can be a little sensitive, and you may end up with a Rudolph nose for a few minutes or a few hours I suppose. I didn't time how long it takes for the redness to go away. Yeah, and I do believe this tool has the potential to leave bruises for it actually does leave some bruising after each use. They go away though. I have heard of scarring in other reviews, but so far, it hasn't happened to me.

    The tool my family has came with a USB cord, where the device must be charged through the computer. After charging, I guess it's okay to use again.

    Well, I do feel this tool is effective when wanting to thoroughly clean your face. You just have to be okay with some bruising and redness it leaves behind. They do disappear hopefully in a few hours. Well, I am still not sure about this tool and I will give an update as soon as I have something else to add to my review.

    UPDATE:  I learned this tool can leave wounds on your face. My advice is to only have it on the first or second power, and don't turn it all the way to the maximum power which is five or six. It can bruise up your face pretty bad. 

    Vacuum Facial Review

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